Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Accepting Love


I saw this photo and text on Tumblr, and was intrigued by the underlying message that I can heavily relate to. As a person who has experienced debilitating self-consciousness, this saying reminds me of exactly how I felt, and sometimes still feel, about my self-worth. 

Over the years I've had a hard time getting close to people as fast as I deem to be normal. I'm a pro pessimist, always assuming people don't like me from the get go and I therefore have to prove something to them; that I'm worth it, that I'm not stupid, that I'm not dumb. I literally, perhaps unconsciously, discourage people from having a friendship with me because I feel as though I don't deserve their love and kindness.

Love
is something I need to learn to accept and I need to learn to effectively distribute.

This photo I found on Tumblr was a great reminder of a fundamental trait I have that needs improvement. It seems easy, but I think it's going to take some practice. I want more than anything to shower my friends and family in love, but I've never been able to do it. I've always shied away, assumed they had better friends that love them, assumed I was annoying to them. I honestly thought I didn't deserve their love and kindness.

Writing it out like this makes the idea so pathetic.
It's bullshit.

I say
When it comes down to it, throw away the phrase on that photo. Burn it and bury it. Instead, believe that everyone deserves unlimited amounts of love, and everyone is capable of dishing out the same spectacular amount.

Love is limitless, and I want to take advantage of it.

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