Merry Xmas

As I scroll through social media this Christmas, I suddenly understand why it is so sad to be alone during this holiday. Pages and pages I scroll through of the same pictures: families, stockings, pets dressed up in holiday gear, presents, pajamas, and food. What I realized, was that just about each and every person I know that is near and dear to me, is spending this day with their family, meaning, everyone is preoccupied with their family, except myself. My family is thousands of miles away and I am without relatives and friends. Everything is closed and the weather isn't very inviting.

I'm not looking for pity, I am just pointing out why it is so sad to be alone on Christmas when everyone you know celebrates it. The world is shut down, too busy with hot food, cheesy music, and countless relatives.

Granted, I'm not alone, I do have Zach beside me always, but recently I've realized that I'm a huge fan of tradition. It is the tradition of being with family and large groups of loved ones on this holiday that I'm missing so badly right now. I've already made a vow to myself that no matter where I end up for the rest of my life, I'm going to work hard to save up enough money to visit family and friends during the holidays. I wish I realized earlier how much I valued and prioritized the traditions and family in my life: I could have made some very different choices about where I am today.

You know, I came to a similar realization yesterday through another blog that I utilize. I created a post wording my frustrations about how the majority of people ages 18 to 25 have a "freak out" moment when a few of their friends get engaged, married, or pregnant. I can't tell you how many times over social media that I've seen this phrase, in effect: "Ohmygod, everyone I know is getting engaged, married, or pregnant! What the heck!" In my post, I just asked my followers, "What's the big deal?" One of my friends Kelsey posted a response that made sense to me, a response that will remind you of my alone-on-Christmas feelings. It was, verbatim: "It means there are less people to do things with because they forever will have to do things with their significant other and or baby before they can hang out with you."

And that's exactly where I'm at right now. Everyone is spending time with their families, and Zach and I are not.

But alas, we are not truly alone, we are here in Seattle, spending Christmas together with Odin, and Feared Kraken. We don't even celebrate it, technically, but it will always be a holiday in my heart, a holiday of tradition and family, no matter what I might believe religiously. For a few years, I got Zach to celebrate it as "Materialistically-Show-People-You-Love-Them Day" but I'm afraid that died out, as neither of us exchanged gifts with each other this year.

I might sound pretty mopey, but Zach and I have a good day planned together. We're going to decorate cookies, play some video games, and just indulge in goodies, heated blankets, music, and time together.  I might be missing home, but at least I found a partner who can make me happier than I ever thought possible.

I hope everyone has a beautiful holiday, with whoever you celebrate doing whatever you do. Enjoy it! Indulge! And may you be happy for the rest of your lives :)